This post is for people who fear to be in public places (surounded by a crowd). Being that you suffer from Patm (and you have good reasons for fearing) or not, let’s explore the subconscious side of this phobia and how to heal it.
First, as I did in my previous post. I want to show you what the Dictionary of Emotional Diseases says about Agoraphobia.
Agoraphobia comes from the Greek words AGORA (public square) and PHOBUS (fear). It is fear to the crowds, experiencing anxiety and anguish to the point of feeling panic.
The two great fears of agoraphobia sufferers are the fear of dying and the fear of madness. A propitious situation to develop agoraphobia is the death or madness of a loved one, or have been close to death when younger.
This fear of death is experienced by the patient in many different ways. i.e. he doesn’t think himself capable of facing change in his lifestyle, because it would represent a symbolic death. That´s why any change makes you live moments of great anguish that accentuate your state.
These anxieties and fears can be unconscious and remain hidden for many years until, the patient reach his mental/emotional limit, and, being unable to control them, they become conscious and manifest externally.
The person with agoraphobia also has unrestrained and uncontrollable imagination. He imagines situations out of reality and believes himself unable to cope with those changes. This is not madness, but a sensitivity too large and poorly managed.
If you have the above symptoms, you should know that what you feel is not insanity and that it will not cause you death. You were simply a child too open to the emotions of others, believing also that you were responsible for their happiness or their misery. It is possible that during your childhood you were very dependent on your mother and that you felt responsible for her happiness and for helping her. As a result, you became very sensitive in order to be on the lookout and prevent the misfortunes of those around you. So when you are in a public place, you capture the emotions and fears of others.
The most important thing for you is to learn what your real responsibility is. What you have hitherto believed to be your responsibility, is not, and is rather harmful to you.
If I am affected by agoraphobia, I am probably a very sensitive person, receptive to several levels (especially psychic) and endowed with a very fertile imagination. I am very dependent on the affective plane and I haven’t really cut off the maternal ties. I have difficulty in discerning my true self from what I am creating on the psychic plane, that is, the self I imagine, which fuels my anguish. I am similar to a sponge: I absorb the emotions of others (especially the fears) without discerning what belongs to me from the rest, which increase both my fears and those of others. Therefore, I have a tendency to isolate myself, to feel responsible for everything and to communicate very little.
Also, my level of criticism is high because I live a lot of insecurity, I have little confidence and I think that things and situations do not go as well as I want: therefore, I criticize.
Agoraphobia sometimes is born from a conflict with my mother, whom I constantly criticize.
I must change my attitude right now.
I accept my fears one by one, as they are, because I know that they poison my life, but they can also make me progress!
I learn to love and accept myself, to love my maternal and protective side (mother), to build a physical and inner universe full of happiness, without criticism or dependence. I also have the advantage of expressing myself in my verbal communication and my creativity. I must overcome the fear of “losing my place” and being in harmony with myself!
I remain responsible for my happiness, even if I have a tendency to believe that I determine both the happiness and the misfortune of others. I accept to take risks and anticipate my fears that restrain my creative power. This will help me control my life and my inner impulses.
So, was it accurate for you?
In my case it definitely was.
Since I have memory, I have been gifted with an extremely high sensitivity. I used to canalize it thru art, painting, writing poems, singing, etc. But I always tried to be alert in case somebody needs to be cheered up.
In 2007, I faced a great earthquake in Lima, and while I was very calm and easy. Some minutes later I realized many people died product of that earthquake. The idea of people diying while I was just outside my house, very cool and easy because I knew I was safe. Gave me a real Shock. In the deep of my heart I felt a great sorrow for not being able to do anything and for feeling so safe in the same time that others were diying.
After this event, I started feeling panic atacks that Thanks God I surpassed by praying and increasing my faith. And then some months later I realized my sensitivity was becoming bigger and bigger. Until some months ago when I finally realized that I developed that hability of catching other people’s fears (Initially I had thought they were all my own fears, and that I was getting crazy, but no).
Well, I get this intense anxiety from time to time. Still I can be in the middle of a crowd feeling good and without getting any cough. But of course to achieve this my mind has to be focussed on myself in a happy way.
Still, intense fears from the past (like that one I faced) can make difficult for you to feel okey being in a crowd. So I strongly recommend you one more time, to try the emotional integration of those fears. (Or better, If you are Christian, just pray to be healed from those specific fears, and ask some friends to pray for you. Later I will upload a post about the Power of prayers, they are so powrful!)
For trying the Emotional Integration therapy, go to this post
Later, complementing the emotional healling it may still be neccesary to take some tangible actions, so here I will share with you this 5 strategies, which I consider very important to recover your longed social skills.
Strategy #1 Face your fear head on. – Realize that there is nothing to be embarrassed about. Thousands of others face what you are facing every single day. You are not alone in this battle. For this strategy to be most effective, it is best to gradually build up your exposure. Then spend some time in the presence of the very thing that fuels your agoraphobia. Start slow and small and gradually work your way up. Practice and repetition are the keys to this strategy working.
Strategy #2 Don’t let panic or setbacks paralyze you. – Everyone has a bad day now and then. The important thing is not to let yours debilitate you from moving forward. Although such days may make it feel like you’re not making any progress, they’re deceitful. On such occasions, step back and assess how far you’ve come with your agoraphobia. If you’re being honest with yourself, chances are you’ll see some real results. Eliminate all doubt and keep telling yourself, “If I’ve come this far, I can keep going. I will prevail.” And then go, go, go starting now, or at the very latest tomorrow.
Strategy #3 Keep a big picture perspective. – “what opportunities you have to lose.” You’re afraid of crowds but what is allowing your fear of crowds to have a stranglehold over you causing you to miss out on? Don’t live with regrets or put off embracing major changes until it’s too late.
Strategy #4 “Treat fear as a call to action.” – Rather than thinking of it as a crippling aspect of your personality that you just have to keep living with, consider it a wake-up call—as a motivator to start claiming the life you’ve always wanted. “Write down a specific plan of the exact steps that you’ll take,” the publication recommends.
Strategy #5 “Rewire your brain.” – Hypnotherapy has proven itself to be a very effective means of permanently rewiring the brain against enochlophobia or ochlophobia or demophobia or agoraphobia. And the good news is that thanks to today’s technology, hypnosis can be performed extremely cost-effectively from the comfort and convenience of your own home.
Source: http://www.hypnosisondemand.com/overcome-enochlophobia-ochlophobia-demophobia-agoraphobia-fear-crowds/ by Mark Patrick
Well that’s all!
If you have any comment or testimony, it is so wellcome!
God Bless you!
Just be happy anyway 🙂